Resolutions – are you into them I wonder?

Resolutions – are you into them I wonder?

Firstly, Happy New Year – 2022!

New Year often begins with a lot of chatter about ‘making resolutions’ – have you made yours?

In recent years, I haven’t, as there feels like a negative connotation associated with them (they always sound cup half empty to me) so let’s CAN that idea & go for thinking possibilities instead (more half full – more my cup of tea for sure) and sounds far more POSITIVE!

I wonder what might shift YOU this year. Looking after yourself, putting your oxygen mask on first, so you are in a much better position to support others. Small ‘epic’ steps rather than setting ourselves HUGE unrealistic targets.

I wonder if these thoughts have already gone through your head…

If I could just get myself to the gym twice a week, then I could get that spare tyre off from around my midriff. I will feel better, more toned & I can change my body (smaller bottom, less chunky thighs…you get my gist)
If I could get through dry January and give myself a break from a glass of wine or two, then I will minimise my next day hangovers, tiredness & fatigue
If I could just kickstart my diet for a couple of weeks, then I will be able to fit into my skinny jeans againand feel comfortable going out for dinner with my partner
If I loose that stone, then I will be happy (again) and life returns to ‘normal’ (on repeat…)
If I make more effort with my family, kids (f you have them) & relationship – then I will feel more sociable & happier

Lots of if’s here – have you noticed?

These kinds of resolutions usually come from a place of self-criticism, comparison & a disappointment for who & how we are. If we sit with the shoulds, coulds, musts, have tos, we keep ourselves in a state of blame, judgement & shame. This keeps us stuck and quite frankly how does this make us feel better about ourselves!?We bully ourselves to change from a place of fear. How is that a way to treat ourselves?

Swap self-judgement & blame for self-compassion. Listening to our inner coach rather than the critical voice (or chimp on my shoulder, as I like to refer to him and yes you can give him or her – the ‘bully’ a name) is a far kinder space to be in, to help us move forward & feel comfortable with ourselves.

So, are you ready for 2022?

Self-care is the name of the game – A pocket of time for you. Small lifestyle ‘epic’ changes that can make a big difference.

Be mindful – with food (enjoy what you are eating & savour each mouthful), get outside or time with a pet is very therapeutic
Meditate – try Calm, Insight Timer or the Headspace app
Gratitude – jot down 3 things you are grateful for every day.
Movement – go for a walk, do some yoga, stretches, or an on-line class (you don’t have to go to a gym)
Nature – get out in the fresh air for some downtime with your pooch, a friend or combine both!
Nourish your body – nutrition (no ‘quick fix’ diets here – sends your body into denial 7 we know what happens then.) to help manage & sustain your energy levels
Journal – get your thoughts down on paper – clear your mind – right down any worries & come back to them at then end of the day to afford them some contained time to see if they still hold the same power later on
Give your day some structure – get to bed earlier, get up at the same time & to bed too. Sleep & rest aremedicine.
Tune into those negative thoughts. Beat the bully & swap for affirmations instead “I am good enough”, “I nourish my body”, “I love myself”, “I can do this” – you get my drift.
Boundaries – Yes, it’s OK to say NO, stop pleasing others and put yourself first, so you are able to give your best to others. “I am now longer available to…….” is a great phrase to have in your boundary toolkit.

Or you can try therapy, to better understand where these thoughts, judgements, blame & criticism come from. Take a look at what has happened in the past for you to be in this “way of thinking & feeling”.  Allow yourself to heal in 2022. Get in touch with me: https://clarity-kent.co.uk/get-in-touch/

 

 

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